by Beverly Smith, Kindermusik mom
Every day is a challenge when you’re a mom. Some days are worse than others and sometimes those harder days seem to multiply. This week my challenge has been a stomach bug that caused us to miss Kindermusik. Last week it was Isabelle’s tantrums that made it hard to do a play date. A few weeks before that it was sleep regression due to us moving houses … the list goes on and on. We all have bad days as mothers, but it’s how we face them that makes them bad or good.
This morning, I was awakened by a child who was sick - threw up - in her bed, for the second day in a row. After cleaning the mess and giving her a bath, I faced it head on with a trip to Starbucks for a treat. The trip also got us out of the house. My daughter was getting stir crazy too. She was upset we couldn’t go to Kindermusik, her weekly treat, and I was sad to miss the social interaction. The coffee helped me to feel ready for our day and get some form of social interaction with the outside world. The ride made her happy, so it was a win win. Sometimes all you need is an little adventure to turn your day around. We’ll make up our class later in the week and Isabelle will get some much needed rest at home. Today, my coffee cup was half full, not empty.
I’ve discovered that a positive attitude is great for you and your child. When a negative attitude takes over, not only do you feel defeated, but it makes your child upset too. Your child feels your stress (literally, as the heart’s energy field is shared and perceived) and it can make them feel upset and insecure. That’s why it’s important to remember the little treats that make the hard times better. For me, it’s coffee or even a simple walk. For the hardest times, I schedule a girls night or date night out of the house.
Other options can be playing upbeat music, praying, meditation, calling a friend, watching a fun movie with Isabelle, baking, dancing, even a shopping trip alone can give you a good reboot. Whatever brings you joy, do it! Get the essential stuff done and then do something to lighten up the day.
You can’t take care of anyone well until you’ve taken care of yourself. Don’t feel guilt about giving yourself a treat because you need to take care of yourself, too. Mommy guilt is real, but let it go and find your happiness.